Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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