Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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