I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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