butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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