My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
