i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
