the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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