I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
