I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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