I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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