so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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