There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize