So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
