a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
