What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Farmville is her only friend.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
