Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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