we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
This is my gift to your gina
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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