Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
