My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
