youre lurking in front of me
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
