Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize