wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My ass is underappreciated
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize
