look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Alive.
So much puke
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
