I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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