Where did you get a picture of my penis
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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