I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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