the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
