my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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