Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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