I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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