I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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