That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
