he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Bang-toberfest begins!!
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
