So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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