big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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