Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
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you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
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All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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