Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
