No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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