dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
