? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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