So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
She's the barista slut.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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