you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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