Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize