We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
