He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Randomize
