Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
