I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
