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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!

  (630): View more from Illinois

  U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate

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• (310): View more from California

  This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat

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• (940): View more from Texas

  BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?

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• (206): View more from Washington

  How did the surgery go?

  (425): View more from Washington

  My face feels like a marshmallow.

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• (323): View more from California

  in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels

  (209): View more from California

  you need to stop fucking English majors

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