So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
