her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
